Got majorly high to see this (thank God I did) and took notes throughout. Here they are:
This explains why James Corden was rejected from every audition for ten years before becoming famous. Can't sing or dance and I want to punch his voice
Looks like Rebel is jacking it in one scene?- a furry was born somewhere today
No fur on hands, no buttholes (a very prominent cat feature)
Music isn't even good
Their faces look pasted on like a bad Snapchat filter
Fever dreaminess of Across the Universe with none of the grace, style, or maturity
Like Garfield had a baby with a horse girl
Weird 4th wall breaking implying we too are cats
They warn you about the scary uncanny-valley cats; they don't warn you about the roaches and mice
Choreo is actually aight
I no longer trust theater kids that like Andrew Lloyd Webber
Unbearable cat puns-AND SO MANY OF THEM
Jason Derulo English accent .... Kinda hot
Victoria wants to bang everyone- even the magician. Nobody wants to bang magicians.
CGI so bad it looks like a kids show or a bad cut scene
My APD can’t handle Growltiger's song seriously I still know nothing about him after that song
Also still don't understand why the cats have three names
I wanna rub my face all over judi dench
:( jealous of that actor
Ian McKellen best line: "KAKKHHHAKKAHKKK”
The sudden synchronized tail twitch of 20 cats gave me a jump scare
Why are they suddenly wearing high tops?
Memory is obviously a beautiful song but I think the song after it is kinda underrated
My friend fell asleep, and a whole family left during Judi Dench’s song
WHAT THE F--K IS A JELLICLE IM OVER HALFWAY THROUGH AND I STILL DONT KNOW
The song about how theater used to be good and now it sucks was a bold choice to put in a movie adapted from the musical that singlehandedly marked the downfall of theater
Still a better tap dance than La La Land, even with the male stripper-esque conductor cat
Scale of cats is confusing. One fit into the human's shoes but also was smaller than a plate?
Cat spinning into air and turning to dust made me go
Why did Taylor swifts cat get the biggest boobs?
Jason Derulo can do a better British accent than Taylor swift
Most cats where pretty much always naked but Idris Elba was like... extra naked?
Victoria is so annoying further proving everyone named Victoria kinda sucks
When jason Derulo said I felt that
When Magical Mr Mestopholes turned into Matilda and then nearly made out with Judi dench I died
Omg Victoria putting herself in EVERYONES BUSINESS she ALWAYS has to be the center of attention
Judi dench reexplains the movie at the end in case you didn’t catch the “plot” in the last 2 hours of mess
I think a think to be a Jellicle Cat you just have to be a horny bisexual cat that’s into MILFs
This movie ends with victoria making sex eyes at magic cat. Then magic cat makes sex eyes with narrator cat and they scurry off at the same time. Then Victoria and Judi Dench make sex eyes at each other. Judi Dench kills Jennifer Hudson. The end.
